


Dancing Colors

by H4T08



Series: Behind the Door [19]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Aurora Borealis, Date Night, Episode: s03e06 Remember, F/M, first person POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 17:57:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14857493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/H4T08/pseuds/H4T08
Summary: Already picturing it in my mind, I nearly jump when the first sound reverberates from my soul through my fingers. My goodness, that sound, that heavenly sound. But am I able keep it going?Sensing my elation mixed with hesitation, the kind voice encourages me with a gentle push. Keep that image in your mind and let the happiness flow through you. Feel its warmth. Allow it to take you.I once again close my eyes and conjure up the image of Chakotay against the backdrop of the bright dancing colors.





	Dancing Colors

**Author's Note:**

> Story takes place during the episode ‘Remember’ when they are at the concert. 
> 
> This one is another first person POV from Janeway.
> 
> There's a lot of background history I put in here. I have not read the books, so if there is anything that glaringly stands out, please let me know!

** Janeway POV **

His music is so soft, so delicate; it magically takes me back to the bright colors, the dancing lights in Norway.

It’s been a long time since I have thought of it, but the music, the harmonics, the chords brings about the memory so clear, so finite that I can feel the cool crisp air racing through the fjords.

It was the year before I was set to go to Starfleet Academy. The whole summer I had pitched a fit because I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to go to the Academy. There were many fights between daddy and I after I told him of my hesitation. At one point, we refused to talk to one another for fear of instigating another argument.

Phebs has already made it clear that she would never go to the Academy, so daddy put it all on my shoulders – and I desperately hated him for it.

Then one day, he told us that we were going to Norway for the night. The next day, he was set to go on a deep-space mission that would take him away for twelve months. I had refused, of course, until my momma put her foot down.

We did the stupid tourist thing for the day. Me and daddy were still not talking and Phebs was constantly complaining about not going on some stupid date with her flavor-of-the-month boyfriend.

By nighttime, we were all tired and annoyed as hell – that is until the clear dark sky lit up.

Colors, beautiful colors, exploded right before my eyes. I had read about it before and had even seen various holo-images. I knew the science behind it, had studied it and other natural Earth phenomenons in class.

But seeing it, right before me, it had taken my breath away.

For the first time, in a long time, I looked towards the sky and it filled me with excitement and curiosity. Blues, greens, purples swept across me, carrying me with it to the heavens itself. The stars on the clear night shined brighter, as if begging me to explore them.

I knew right then and there that my home would lie in the stars.

I hugged daddy as we watched colors dance across the sky. The next day, when I woke up, he was gone.

It still took me a few months to decide where I wanted to go, but in the end I chose the Academy and the rest, they say, is history.

Something, perhaps an invisible string, pulls me away from those colors I had fallen in love with so long ago back to the present time.

Delta Quadrant. Stardate 50203. The Enarans.

I don’t want to be here. I want to go back. I need to go back.

The logical voice inside my head reminds me that if – by some miracle in space and time – Voyager makes it back to Earth in my lifetime, I will never see Aurora Borealis with daddy again.

The depression that settles heavily upon my chest is too much to bare. I long to see those colors, but what I really want is to see daddy again.

_The memory will live in your heart forever, my dear._

Who was that?

_No one will ever be able to take it away from you. Never._

The music stops and along with it, my driving need to see the Borealis simmers into a long lost hope. For the first time since the first chord of the instrument rung out, I can breath. I drink in the air as clapping erupts around me.

Yet, despite the lack of oxygen, I still long for the music. Jor Brel offers his instrument to me and asks if I would like to play.

I gladly accept his invitation, despite the horrid memories of trying to stretch my finger along the expanse of black and white keys on my momma’s piano, somehow through this instrument I will be able to experience those dancing colors. Perhaps a few lessons wouldn’t hurt.

_Take it in, child. Return to the Aurora Borealis. Return to your father._

Taking in a quick breath, I'm surprised to hear that same congenial voice in my head. Letting out a steady stream of warm air, I ignore the heady eyes staring at me as my hands hover over the neck and bauble.

_Think of the one single thing in this universe that fills you with happiness._

Instantly, the image of Chakotay in the canoe he just built lazily gliding along the waters of our lake comes into my mind. A pinprick of lightness pierces my soul and warmth cascades over its darkest corner. I smile. Although, I do not have daddy with me, I have Chakotay.

_Now imagine him in the canoe with Aurora Borealis lighting the sky behind him._

Already picturing it in my mind, I nearly jump when the first sound reverberates from my soul through my fingers. My goodness, that sound, that heavenly sound. But am I able keep it going?

Sensing my elation mixed with hesitation, the kind voice encourages me with a gentle push. _Keep that image in your mind and let the happiness flow through you. Feel its warmth. Allow it to take you._

I once again close my eyes and conjure up the image of Chakotay against the backdrop of the bright dancing colors.

_Immerse yourself. Become one with the image._

I open myself to the image wholeheartedly. Once again, the desire to see such colors, to feel the coolness against my skin rushes like a waterfall against my ears. The pinprick of light widens in my soul.

Yet, something is different, something has changed. Instead of the bright streaking lights or the gentle tug of the canoe, I see a room with a person standing at the front window.

_Feel the love. Let it in._

I return back to Norway. The cool nip of crisp air presses against the tip of my nose, yet, warm arms – Chakotay’s arms – holds me close to his chest, waves of iridescent beauty passing over us.

Then, I am back in that same room. Lessons upon lessons of how to play the instrument race through my mind, my fingers mimicking Jor Brel’s movement. I see him behind me now. The feel of his mind pushing against me, forcing me to stroke the way he wants me to move.

I try to move away from him, but he counters my resistance with images of Chakotay against the dancing lights. Lips, so soft, draws a sultry line down the curve of my neck. It feels so good, he feels good. The symphony I play grows in strength to the sensual rhythm of his lips against my skin.

Just as my heart rate slows to a crawl, I tilt my head to the side, desperate to feel more of those delicious lips, when I return back to that room. It’s only now that I realize that the lesson had never really stopped.

Opening my eyes and catching the instrument before it falls out of my lap, my body burns with embarrassment for anyone and everyone to see. Instantly, I feel Tuvok’s presence and I find it to be soothing, as if I have sipped clear, crisp water for the first time in years. “I'm alright.” My throat is dry, burning, as both images continue to sizzle along the edges of my mind.

Jor Brel quickly takes the instrument from my hands and apologizes for the intrusion, claiming to be be unaware of my sensitivity, despite my knowledge of telepathic abilities.

_It is I who should be sorry, Captain._

My sluggish mind ignores the voice as it tries to keep up with the basic comprehension skills needed to follow this conversation.

Instantly, I feel a wall erect itself around my mind. Glancing up, I notice Tuvok staring at me with precision focus. Is he the one helping me? Ever since our dalliance with the multiple mind melds, I have come away with an… I don’t know… impression in my mind. It’s like I can feel his presence, yet, he goes to extreme lengths to make sure that I am not bothered by it.

Tonight, though, I find it to be a blessing.

As smoothly as I can, I thank Jor Brel for his lessons, despite the intrusive nature of them. They are our guests and I need to make sure that the rest of their journey with us remains without conflict.

Just as the group breaks away and hurt feelings have been mended, I slip over to the side of the room, away from prying minds.

Tuvok follows me.

He doesn’t say anything to me, telepathically, but he doesn’t need to. I can sense his frustration a million kilometers away even if we had never mind melded a month and a half ago. The gentle reach of his telepathic tendrils strengthens me with every step I take.

“Captain?” Even though he screams indifference, I can hear the concern in Tuvok’s voice.

“I’m fine, I just—”

“Perhaps you should take your leave.” Pressing his lips into a thin line, he glances over to Chakotay and murmurs just between us, “I have taken the necessary precautions we had discussed earlier.”

I try like hell not to laugh out loud, but it mainly comes out as a snort – so much so that the people closest to us turn to look at me funny. “Thank you, Mr. Tuvok.” Noticing the tips of his ears turn pink, I give him one more triumphant smile before walking up to Jor Brel to give him my well wishes for another peaceful night.

Just before I walk out, I stop by the small group consisting of Tom Paris, Ayala, Neelix, Chakotay, and Joe Carey all huddled near the bar.

“I bet you five replicator rations that Harry’s going to – oh, hello Captain.” Tom Paris tries to hide his sneaky grin from me. “I never knew you were musically inclined. I think I overheard Neelix put your name down for the next talent night.”

On cue, Neelix pipes up, “You performed beautifully, Captain.”

I can feel my cheeks blush a deep red. “I’m calling it a night, gentlemen.” I glance over my shoulder to see young Harry Kim flirting with the pretty Enaran woman he has been sweet to the entire time they have been on our ship. “And leave Harry alone. He’s too nice to have a random hookup with her.”

Both Joe and Chakotay snort while Tom, Neelix and Ayala look at me as if I had suddenly grown a third head.

“Gentlemen,” I give Chakotay one last look before bowing out.

And just like that – I am mentally snapping my fingers – the sluggishness from my interaction with Jor Brel slides into an anticipation, feral and wild as it charges up my spine with every step I take. I can feel his eyes boring me – wanting me – and, God, I want him.

This is our first night where we will be having dinner together since that night after those little fucking shits took our wormhole. That night was all about reacquainting ourselves with each other.

Tonight, it will be more. This will be our first real date since New Earth.

And when I say ‘real date’, I mean one that actually involves dinner and conversation and an actual bed.

Grant it, the wall was just as… fulfilling as a bed.

Stealing a few glances down the corridor, I put in the code that Tuvok had told me that would activate the program to help mask my true signal. I will still be able to communicate with someone if need be, however, if anyone were to ask for my whereabouts, it will place me in my quarters.

To my immediate relief, it works and I slink in before anyone can see.

Okay, so, first things first, dinner. If everything is on schedule, then Chakotay should be coming in just as the food is being placed on the table.

“Tuvok To Captain Janeway.”

“Yes, Mr. Tuvok.”

“Everything is as it should. Have a good evening.”

Seriously?! Well, I’m glad my super secret booty call code is working up to proficient standards. “Have a good evening, Tuvok. I’ll see you at 0900.” I hear the door open behind me. “Janeway out.” Just as I turn to greet Chakotay, he wraps his arms around my legs a lifts me up around his waist.

“You look insatiable tonight,” his lips mumble against my neck.

“I was just about to get dinner ready,” I pout.

“Dinner can wait,” he growls. He actually growled and I find it oddly attractive. He carries me into his bedroom and throws me down onto the bed, caveman style. He takes off both of our shoes at the same time before pulling my pants down my legs.

“My, my, my! Someone is rather impatient tonight.” I reach for the clasp of his pants as he adds his shirt to the floor. I shove my hand down into his boxers and wrap my fingers around him.

Fuck! He is hard as steel under my touch and I want nothing more than for him to fuck me into this bed, but – call me romantic – I want us to take things slow tonight. It’s our first date since pizza at Château de Chakotay on New Earth.

His hips jerk and press further into my hand, silently begging me to pick up the pace.

So I do.

Then he looks at me as if he hadn’t seen me in a long time. Those eyes of his; dark brown, gentle, loving, so full of emotions, vulnerable. He wants more of me.

So I give him all that I can give.

With my hand and my mouth working together, it doesn’t take a long time for him to reach his peak with him yelling out my name in that same growling voice.

“That…,” he tries to catch his breath, “that was exquisite.”

“I was hellbent on having dinner first, however I do enjoy a good dessert.”

He falls down onto his knees in front of me. “Mmmm,” the tip of his nose trails along the inside of my thigh, “fuck dinner.”

“I want us to have dinner.” The sincerity in my voice even surprises me, yet my body, loving the feel of his warm breath against my puckered skin, does the complete opposite and pulls him closer towards where I ache the most.

“Are you sure?” His smug smile is worthy of melting the panties off of any woman.

Yes! “No.” Fuck! “You’re making this very hard.”

He hums in his sexy little agreement, which nearly sends me falling back, but I stop when he pulls away. “Very well, but I want you to strip.” He stands up, that ‘come-fuck-me’ smile setting off those ‘sit-your-pussy-on-my-face’ dimples.

Who am I kidding, I wouldn’t be able to say no even if I wanted to, which I don’t. Standing up, I strip down to my bare skin, inch-by-blessed-inch and I can see him growing harder under my little show. Picking up one of his shirts from the floor, I pull it over me and walk out to the replicator.

He follows after me like a lost puppy, but with the smell of food now in front of me, my need for sustenance outweighs my desire to have him eating me out. “Sit.” Both of our stews look absolutely divine.

“The song you played, earlier tonight, it was beautiful.”

“It was more of a mental instrument. It plays based on what you are feeling and thinking.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Aurora Borealis from Earth.” That quirk of curiosity in his brow has me melting in my chair. “I had been only once before, but it was enough to send me to the stars.”

“I had assumed that you had always wanted to explore the stars.”

“Maybe when I was small and still impressionable to my father’s stories. When I was a teenage, I became dissuaded by the lack of my father’s presence in my life. The summer before my senior year, we had a big fight about me going into Starfleet. Before he left, he took us to see the Borealis.”

“When you talked about your father – albeit it has been very few and far between – you seem as if you are proud of his work, proud that you had followed within his footsteps.”

That’s what will happen when you watch your father die on an away mission – it makes all those little fights and squabbles non-existent. “At that age, I was proud of him, I just wasn’t sure if I wanted what he had dreamed about when he was young.” I run my finger along the condensation of my glass. “He had grown up with the harrowing stories of Captain Kirk and the Enterprise crew.”

“And who doesn’t get excited by those tales of bravery in the final frontier?”

I ignore his question. “The Borealis had me looking towards the stars; captivated by its beauty, yet ensnarled by its curiosity as to what else was out there beyond its colors.”

“And the rest is history?”

“I applied and was accepted into many schools, however, I chose Starfleet in the end.”

“And we are lucky for that decision.”

His comment, though innocent enough, leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. Luck that I was here at the right place, at the right time to fuck up everyone’s lives. Bullshit!

The drop of cool water splashing onto my bare thigh brings me out of my silent loathing. “We were in a canoe, the one you had built in the holodeck, in my vision. We were looking at the Borealis together.” His smile brings warmth to my coiled belly. “Then I… I lost control.” Not wanting to ruin the moment, I skip over the part of Jor Brel’s demanding images.

“Were you naked?” His eyes have instantly gone dark, feral, as they rake along my body.

Desire to have to have him between my legs once again coils tightly in the pit of my belly. “No.” Tearing my eyes away, the view of his dick, magnified through his glass table, has me licking my parched lips in anticipation.

“Shame.” His hand flutters down his body and begins to stroke himself.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Are you fucking kidding me! I am pretty damn sure I’m going to leave a stain on his chair if he keeps doing that. Standing abruptly, I keep myself busy with cleaning up our mess. It works for about, ohhh five seconds, or until I walk around the table to gather his bowl.

“You look incredibly sexy in my shirt.” If his words weren’t enough to send a river of excitement down my leg, then the feel of his warm palm covering my ass sure would.

“You don’t like carrots.” I find myself staring down into his bowl to help keep my raging libido in check.

“I love carrots,” his fingers kneed into my muscles, “I just don’t like them in my stew.”

“Mmmm-uhhh.” Great! Just great! Here I am mewing like a fucking teenager in heat. At least I’m not gargling non-existent words. Or making cat noises.

“Take care of our bowls, Kathryn.” Is he really bossing me around? “And when you come back, you will need to sit on the edge of the table in front of me.” Then he pulls away from me and the warmth I am accustomed to now becomes an imprint on my skin, as if had physically left a mark on me.

Fuck! Quickly recycling our bowls, I scurry back in front of him to hitch myself onto the table. I scurried, I actually fucking scurried!

“Place your feet on the armrests of my chair.”

Catching myself by palming the glass, I expose every slick inch of myself to him, much to his obvious delight.

His breath hitches. “Dessert.” He leans in and licks a lazy trail between my legs.

Annnd, fuck does it feel magnificent! I am too charged to drag this out. All it takes is the curves of his fingers and the flicker of his tongue to bring me to my climax. The glass beneath me is slick with my sweat and excitement.

Chakotay must see this as advantageous – shit, I would – when he stands up and buries himself into me.

Annnnd, fuck!

His cock feels so good in me! It’s velvet and fire and too much and not enough.

And then his hands join the mix, melding into my body, playing the strings as if I am his own musical instrument, our moans the percussion marking the beat of our bated breaths.

The muscles in my arms and legs are tiring quickly but the promise of reaching that peak again has me turning a blind eye.

“Kathryn, you are – God! – you are gorgeous. I can’t…,” his breathing becomes labored against the stickiness of my neck.

All at once, his thrusts becomes erratic and everything in me winds up tightly in swirls and swirls of pleasure. Those colors of blues and greens, strikingly gentle across the blackened sky, bursts as each ragged breath brings me closer and closer to perfection. “Ohhhh, Chako—” my legs clinch his hips as we both reach our orgasm together.

Collapsing onto the table, the sting of the thick glass hurts the bony part of my back, but I don’t give a shit. My body is like a jello mold floating through space. The heat from my body escapes rather quickly as I regain my breathing back under control.

“I never knew this table could hold up so well.”

“Hey, I’m just glad we made it past the wall.” Tipping my head to the side, I can hear his smug smile across the galaxy.

“Are you going to stay the night in my bed?”

His question sends a flurry of butterflies along the edge of my stomach. “I might sleep for a bit and wake up early tomorrow like last time.”

“We have Tuvok watching over us and he is nothing if not proficient at accomplishing his task.”

He’s not wrong in that assessment, yet there is a group of people here that he is not taking in account. “The Enarans.” With great difficulty, mainly due to the gelatinous gloop that is my muscles, I push myself up. “During the concert, someone reached out to me telepathically. It was far from intrusive, but after a while it became burdensome.”

“B’Elanna has been having some interesting dreams with herself as being an Enaran.”

“Really?”

“She’s mainly intrigued by them and, according to her, she is not finding them a burden or intrusive whatsoever.”

“If they do, tell her to come see me. I don’t want this affecting her work.”

“Aye, aye, Captain. Now can I take you to bed?” Okay, okay, shop talk done, but before I can say anything else, he stands back up and lifts me into his arms.

Honestly, I’m glad I don’t have to walk. – Oomph! – But I can do without this throw blanket at the end of his bed. “This is rather scratchy.”

He shrugs his shoulders and turns down the sheets. “It has kept me warm on some cool nights.”

“I bet.” He smirks back at me as I crawl in next to him.

I love snuggling. Despite the frigidness I seem to exude, snuggling is my favorite part to spending my night with a man. Mark was a great snuggler with his long arms that could wrap around my entire body and, before that, it was Justin with the barrel of his chest that would act as my pillow.

With Chakotay, it’s the warmth his body gives off. It’s as comforting as a soft blanket or an old pair of worn pajamas, yet, it’s not oppressive. Soon, the familiar pull and tug of sleep lulls my mind and, for once, I hope to dream about colorful nighttime skies and canoe rides.

**Author's Note:**

> I know it has been a while since I have last posted. Work and family had taken me away for a long while. However, with it being summer, I will hopefully post more.


End file.
